Tag Archives: Soldier Field

MAyerWeir

In a performance that woke up more pussy than a pack of barking dogs, Bob Weir and John Mayer lit up the stage last night on The Late Late Show. In unofficial research, Bob Weir performances have been shown to be 10 times more powerful than hormone replacement therapy in aging women. Super fans Jan Longacre and Jen Brandse, both agreed that the last time their estrogen levels were that high they were crawling out of tents, following Ecstasy binges, near Deer Creek. “We don’t need hormone replacement therapy, just more Weir Tunes!!” the ladies exclaimed.

For the faithful folks that insisted on watching the entire show as it aired, they had to endure John Mayer’s monologue that was as funny as having whooping cough and diarrhea at the same time. When Mayer mentioned being known as a womanizer, Weir looked at him like the Lion King would look at Simba and chuckled.

Like many that have come awfully late to the party, John Mayer revealed that Grateful Dead Music has recently hit him harder than a cocktail at Bill Cosby’s house. He too has been sucked into the vortex of Grateful Dead addicition like a housewife on Oprahium. John said that he’s listening to 2 hours of The Dead daily, which is 10 hours less than the rest of us, but admirable. The topic of $40 Million sent to the Stinson Beach office was brought up , as was reported only by The Official Home of Unofficial Grateful Dead News on 1/27.( gratefuldean.com/mail-order-mayhem-continues/ )
He presented Weir with his Mail Order envelope that I hope is returned with the dreaded denial letter from hell like the rest of us… Incredibly, he mentioned the 3 nights at Soldier Field as being Sold Out when tickets don’t go on sale for another 3 weeks. When asked about that, The Illuminati replied, “We don’t really exist.”

As for Bob Weir, his appearances on mainstream television often seem as comfortable as a burlap speedo.  In interviews he’s been known to come across with a sense of humor and perspective that’s dryer than a popcorn fart. Quite possibly one of the coolest cats ever born, Weir talks very similarly to how Garcia played guitar. There’s a certain delay is his delivery that causes you to wonder if he’ll get there. Every time you wonder whether or not Bob heard the question, his answers flow from some kind of eternally delayed yet meaningful source. The way he keeps you leaning back as you’re trying to lean forward while you listen is an inborn gift possessed by him and him only.

Give Weir and Mayer a guitar and they instantly become more comfortable than fat kids at a bakery. We were treated to a wonderful version of Truckin and one of my favorite songs of all time, Althea. Bob delivered confidently as I couldn’t help but to feel as though this was adding another log to the fire in our musical hearts leading up to Chicago or any place the band might appear prior. For the first time since 1982, Weir sang 2 consecutive songs without missing a single lyric. Dead Head Legend, Bobby Gambelunghe, who goes by Bobby G because his last name looks like an accident in Alphabet City, said he couldn’t stop smiling following the performance. “I’m not gay but if they started a “Queer for Weir” Facebook Group, I’d join… Ya know, just to browse the comments is all…”

Even though Dead Heads are seemingly required by unwritten law to have a problem with anybody that has any level of commercial success, I’m a fan of Mayer’s. John has more chops than a Karate Tournament! That brother can infuse the blues into anything. Great job John!

Closing this one out, it was great to see Bob Weir looking good and in great musical form. As we roll towards Chicago, and possibly other stops prior (that should create some shit), we’re enjoying this victory lap together. The Official Home Of Unofficial Grateful Dead And Music News will be here to report. I hope all your dreams come true none the less! I Love You All and there’s not one damn thing you can do about it!!!

Gratefully Deadicated,
Dean Sottile (pronounced SoTilly)

www.gratefuldean.com
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CID Packages Pack a Punch Plus a Few Thoughts From the Official Home of Unofficial News!

hillsofbutthurt

Monday Morning, CID Entertainment revealed their plans and packages for The Grateful Dead’s Fare Thee Well Shows in Chicago. In a highly anticipated moment you could hear the collective sound of thousands of anuses snap shut like Republicans at a Burlesque Show. For some reason, fans thought that being a VIP should come at far less of a price. For those that want to be as close to Garcia as possible during the weekend’s festivities, The Workingman’s Dead Package, sure to sell out relatively fast, affords you the opportunity to have reserved seats not far from Jerry’s current home. Maybe slap a sticker on the blimp as it flies by!!! An absolutely brilliant way to sell the less desirable seats I might add! Some fans wondered if there would be cheaper ways to be part of the action. Joe, the leader of a garage band in the 70s said, “Be a crew slut! You’ll love it! Don’t make a fuss just get on the bus…”

It seems like hippies are extremely upset about pricey plans designed to put prime seats in the hands of the same people they’ve been overcharging for drugs for the past 50 years. Santa Cruz Hippie, who goes by the name, Wholesome Raindrop Sunflake told us, “I never thought those working stiffs I’ve been selling $100 eighths to for the past decade would have better seats than me.Total cash grab, man.” Meanwhile, thousands of nerds that went to college instead of Grateful Dead Tour appeared to be thrilled to have a chance at purchasing something that used to actually require connections.

At approximately 7:30 AM Punxsutawney Phil, saw his shadow which signaled 5 more months of complaining before the shows in Chicago. Of course there are many exceptions to be found. Brother Bob Richards, a man that used to have dreadlocks, said he was happier than a suitcase full of acrobats! Brother Bob who reserved hotel accommodations based solely on rumors told us, “I haven’t been this happy since Jerry sang Candyman, Althea and To Lay Me Down all in one set in Atlanta on April Fool’s Day in 1990.” When asked what he had for lunch or what his mom’s birthday is, Bob was clueless. When asked about the song played in the post space Jerry ballad slot he quickly answered, “Stella Blue!!!” For all the brain cells that have been murdered throughout the years, one thing remains, we all still vividly remember every song that was played on our favorite nights from decades ago.

As for me, with every day that passes, I see more and more of what the Grateful Dead experience has taught me throughout the course of my life. Within our world there are so many different types of personalities. Some can laugh, some insist on crying. Some find joy in just about anything. Others,  when given the same set of circumstances, will only find problems. For many, everything is good enough while for others, nothing is ever good enough. In the early stages of events leading up to this anniversary, it’s like putting a magnifying glass on everybody’s internal condition. That’s something our scene has produced in such a unique way for a long, long time. The free spirited ways of my youth with the Grateful Dead taught me to surrender to the rhythm of life without being attached to my perception of how things should be according to my intellectual estimations. I learned that those that contribute to the scene, without necessarily expecting anything in return, usually stayed on the receiving end of good fortune. I learned that those who preached many of these ideas could easily become something much different when given the opportunity. I also learned that many of the folks that showed me these things stayed pure and true to them even when external opportunities to become something else were being chosen by many around them. I’ve kept those people close. I learned that when the lights went out in the arena the intense lights of self awareness began to shine brightly on my soul and internal condition. I learned not to take myself so damn seriously. I learned that in the middle of a Playin jam, every confused and unsure piece of me would bubble up to the surface for assessment and release if I surrendered to it. I learned in the middle of a China Doll, as tears poured down my face from the depths of my heart, that I was only fractured not completely broken. Just a little nervous, not to be labeled with a condition like anxiety. I learned that I didn’t need a therapist, just close friends and Spring Tour. I learned as the incredible power of a Morning Dew pulled the curtain off of all my fears and insecurities and placed them before my eyes to be dealt with or just stuffed back into a dark corner of my mind. The choice was always mine and mine alone. I learned the immense significance found in it’s closing verse as Garcia reached deep and proclaimed “I guess it doesn’t matterrrr anyyyyy waaaaaaaaaay!!!” The statement was so significant because of depth and magnitude of humility inherent in it’s delivery… Because in all reality, It did matter… It always mattered… It still matters…

Gratefully Deadicated,
Dean Sottile (pronounced SoTilly)

www.gratefuldean.com
Grateful Dean on Facebook
The Official Home of Unofficial Grateful Dead and Music News Facebook Group

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