In two days that sent shockwaves through the spine of what’s now become the biggest event of the year, the same people that have been cured of their porn addictions spent equal amounts of time exercising their frustrations in front of computers. It seems like most of us had as good of a chance banging a porn star as we did getting through on CID or Ticketmaster’s websites. Young heart throbs, One Direction’s previous Ticketmaster record was sent in one direction, down the ladder and replaced by the resurrected Kings of Music as epic numbers of people hit the ticketing sites with every electronic device in their household, all with 10 browsers open. According to authorities within Ticketmaster, the site has received more hits than any site in the history of the world. For the first time since Frank Sinatra, it’s really cool to be old again.
Reports of widespread vertigo followed a day filled with staring at more rotating balls than a participant in a naked Twister tournament. As I write, I still feel like I’m spinning. According to Ticketmaster Time, and teenagers stories of screwing, 3 minutes lasts nearly an hour. For many of us, victory seemed certain until our suspense filled wait returned nothing but an error message as “The Final Four” broke the internet for the third time since January (as a life long Yankee fan I refuse to call them the Core Four).
In a matter of minutes, screen shots from successfully completed orders flooded Dead related sites and for approximately 30 minutes outnumbered those that were complaining. This was another first in the history of the internet. It was also interesting that many people who posted their emails from GDTS TOO, already guaranteeing them tickets, also posted pictures of their successful orders on Ticketmaster. Why were they on there in the first place? To secure tickets for “Family” right? This is the time when everyone that’s talked about cash grabs, StubHub and kindness will be put to the test. Many of you reading this will use the multiple extras to fund your trip and feed your own cash jones. You’ll talk at length about kindness and scalpers and the band being greedy but your extra tickets are already on StubHub. You know who you are. Nobody else might know, but you do. Here’s a suggestion for you, just keep your mouth shut and refrain from all posts regarding scalpers or the band’s and promoter’s financial interests. These are the times when that mirror of self analysis and discovery might show you somebody you’d rather not see. I hope you still don’t use psychedelics because you’ll be tormented by your own decisions during the shows and you’ll feel as though everyone around you can see right through you. You can hide from message board exposure perhaps but what The Dead taught us is that you can’t hide from yourself. Have fun with that…
While many complained feverishly about ticket prices and packages other purchased them just as feverishly. Many posts about the cost of tickets 20 or more years ago reminded me that the best product in the history of live music basically gave themselves away to us for the first 30 years. In my opinion, spending less than $3,000 on a package to be part of an entire weekend celebrating something that has given me more joy in life than anything other than my kids and sharing in this historic moment in musical history is a very small price to pay. It’s become clear to me that the biggest problem our community has suffered with for a long time is the disease of mental poverty and the idea that everything should be given to them. The idea that anybody that has achieved anything in life or makes a respectable living is somehow not a “Real Dead Head”. The thought that because someone can’t afford this trip at this time in their life, that everything about the trip or those that can is wrong, is simply ridiculous. People that cry about money will always cry about money regardless of how much or how little they have. Most of them will never have much because they always see it as a problem and after all, who wants more problems? For decades the mark up on drugs, T-Shirts and grilled cheese sandwiches has been pretty high. I guess “Real Dead Heads” are just all about a cash grab. Those that are truly in a place of need, I’m sorry and I sincerely wish I could make it all better for you. Unfortunately, me having less will never provide you with more. This event, to me, is well worth the considerable sacrifice in time and money I’ll be making in order to be there. I have no problem contributing generously to the community that enriched my life far beyond my ability to repay. If we had to pay for everything the Grateful Dead have given us in life, NONE of us would be able to pay it back. This band owes me absolutely NOTHING and I’m forever in debt to them…
The purpose of this week in review is to reach out and give all of you a gigantic virtual hug. I’m as happy for those that have acquired tickets as I am sad for those that haven’t yet. This reminds me a lot of what brought me so deep into the Grateful Dead experience in the first place. The ability to experience such a wide range of intense emotions. Some rise… Some fall… Some climb…
Within the context of a single show we laughed and experienced moments of intense ecstasy. We sat stripped of our egos looking at our own souls and cried from deep within our hearts during other moments within the same show. We expressed incredible joy in the midst of a Scarlet-> Fire jam and found ourselves in a puddle of our own tears during the Wharf Rat an hour later as the syrupy sweet harmonies of “I knoooow that the Liiiiiiiiiiiiiife I’m living’s noooooo good” blasted through us to our core and shook any wayward fragments from our foundations. It was easy to look around you and see thousands of others being stripped of their bullshit along with you. Those that came around long and often enough to become clear and solid enough on the inside found pure bliss knowing they were free from the need to get up and fly away yet could, just for the sake of it, if they choose to do so. They weren’t now in this position to judge those that hadn’t got there yet. They were there to be compassionate and supportive of the process they already passed through and to love and nurture those that were where they used to be. You did this knowing you could return to the side of the equation requiring compassion and support at any time through the inevitable trials of life. That kind of compassion isn’t supposed to be based on whether or not we get our way or things turn out in our favor but simply because we choose that as a way of life regardless of the perceived short term outcome.
I think we all actually enjoy or at least recognize the immense value and potential for growth in the entire emotional spectrum. Within our lives with the Dead we were able to experience all of them intensely but within the confines of an event that would limit how long most of those emotions would linger. After we were usually left raw and emotionally dismantled from a Garcia ballad, Weir tunes as show closers typically allowed us to leave with a bright outlook for our future. It was a 3 hour sermon on life that usually ended with a message of hope.
I’ll admit I was extremely wrong about the demand surrounding this event. I thought Soldier Field was big enough that there would be free tickets in the parking lot. Furthur played for years and wouldn’t come close to selling out Soldier Field. I sure was terribly wrong. There was no way for anyone involved to predict what this has become. If so, they just would’ve rented the state of Kansas for the weekend. Looking for people, places and things to blame for problems, never in history, has solved a single problem. Living to be a blessing to others has solved many of them. As mail order confirmations overlapped with online sales, there’s going to be A LOT of people with extra tickets. Will you be one of the people that rationalizes your way to StubHub citing mama’s health crisis or fabricating some other tragedy as your reason to do so? I hope not…
Will the way you live cause one of those people with extras to want to give you one? I hope so…
As a Dead Head that got a haircut a couple of decades ago, I’m always amused at all the kind “Real Dead Heads” in full Guatemalan camo and dreads, that see me at the Cap for a Phil show or wherever I may be and find me to be the ideal candidate to scalp their extra to. They seem to be looking for somebody clean enough to feel comfortable scalping. I love when they offer to “Hook me up” brah. Apparently I’m too clean looking to be a “Real Dead Head”. When I began to speak their language and question them on their behavior, they instantly began to look like a dog that shit in the living room. Ears back and struggling with eye contact, feeling guilty… In the months ahead, don’t find yourself looking like a dog that shit in the living room…
Love you all…
Gratefully Deadicated,
Dean Sottile (pronounced SoTilly)
www.gratefuldean.com
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nailed it again. Great work on this blog.
You remind me what and why we were/are about.
Love, josh
Love you Dave!
Perfectly stated!
Dave Loves you too I’m sure!!!!
LOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE this write up!!!! Dead on. I’m still one in limbo but chose to stay away from the chaos of TM & trust the universe to land my family exactly where we’ve earned our place~wherever that may be. It’s out of my hands but at least I’m not hanging out in the living room!
Nailed it Dean…I couldn’t agree more
dude! Nailed it! Grateful, respectful, perspective-ful and all around right on! I have never experienced so much negativity, crass, disrespectful and generally abhorrent behavior from people I have chosen to call “family” for so many years. There’s simply no excuse. I understand why it is, but still without excuse. Thank you for a great article, arguably the best I’ve seen thus far. I hope to see you in Chicago while dancing my face off at the last “Dead” show ever 🙂
Well done Dean. Probably the best thing I’ve read about this.
AWESOME write-up Dean!
Perception. What load of crap!
You nailed it! See things for what they are.
PEACE!
Absokutely nailed it. Unfortunately, as we were told our order had been partially filled via email, then to read if we received an email we got our tickets, “The Powers that be” needed to be a little more clear as to what that exactly meant. It was apparent that these shows (possibly the biggest in music history) would be a sellout and then some. So, being somewhat confused (yet listening to the music play) we too caught ourselves trying to score VIP packages to insure we would not miss this opportunity. Hindsight is such a good lesson at times and often always too late, they should’ve considered moving the CID and Ticketmaster sell days back a few more weeks in order to let those of us lucky enough to have our orders filled through the mail order process time to completely understand if we scored 1, 2 tickets or 1, 2 3 days, etc. In turn, some people like us would not have contributed to the chaos on Thursday and Saturday trying to make sure we would be there. Now, we play the waiting game to see exactly what we will receive and then the chaos of scurrying around to score the remaining shows at outrageous prices will happen, all in an effort to do exactly what this letter stated, to be apart of something that has given me so much joy and comfort in my life. Songs and memories that seem to have a place in almost every aspect of my life. Good luck my friends and I hope to see you in Chicago, if not, hold on tight to what this music, scene, and culture has provided you at times in your life. I’m choosing an “Attitude of Gratitude” as the next few months pass by in preparation of this historic event.
Be well,
Tim
Amen brother!
Glad I’m old enough to have seen the Dead play in venues like the roller rink in Rio Nido back in the late 60’s where it cost only $4 (which I usually panhandled) to get in and there were always less then 100 people inside. That along with the free concerts in Golden Gate Park and the panhandle made me a fan. Then I got to work a bunch of shows with the boys, in various different configurations…Jerry alone, Bob and his band or the Dead as a whole. So glad I don’t have to go thru this kind of bovine scat…
I love your post! I followed the dead for a while back in the 90’s. I worked as a waitress, saved my money, prepaid my rent so I had a place to come back to , took time off from my job so I had a job to come back to , and roamed around for a couple months across the country. I was young and free , I had some dreads growin, I slept in my friends van, I sold hand painted tape covers, sold sammy smiths and falafels, I had a ball!There were so many heads that would rip us off or ask us for money . I would say well in the real world I have a job , So many dead heads would condemn me ! They would say stuff like , your a slave to society , you work for the man! and stuff like that ….. I would just get so confused! I felt free and self reliant , these dead heads would say negative stuff to me and then turn around and ask me for money. Sometimes I would give them free food or a ride cuz i was nice but … it was confusing. Was I less of a fan because I had enough money to enjoy myself? I was so proud of my accomplishments, I was able to buy mail order tickets for a whole tour at 18 years old and I was a waitress. I can’t believe what I read on fb now along the same lines. Its crazy . I still think 9,000 bucks for a ticket is insane tho. Why oh why do all these tickets have to go to ticket resalers ?That is a crime. Thanks for your article . 🙂
I am a little put off by your comments on people complaining about paying such high ticket costs and how they should have done better in life to be able to afford the prices. “The thought that because someone can’t afford this trip at this time in their life, that everything about the trip or those that can is wrong, is simply ridiculous”. Well, if you must know, I have done well for myself over the years but having a family late (due mostly to following the Dead for so many years), my priorities are family first. If I have an extra $2,500, it’s going to my kids college fund, not blowing it on a weekend in Chicago. You sound more like a republican at a Walker fundraiser with your should have worked harder and made more of yourself speech. I don’t begrudge anyone who wants to spend 3,000 on tickets. Just don’t give me shit and put me down for calling it what it is either. Enjoy the show.
You have poor reading comprehension skills. Shocking coming from somebody with a .gov email…
Hey, sorry about the Walker comment. I still haven’t heard from GD mail order and I’m a little testy these days. I got your point, (don’t blame others for being successful and being able to buy high dollar tickets and not everything dead related should be free) but you have an underlying theme in your commentary that people should have enough money by this point in their lives to pay these exorbitant prices for tickets without whining about it. It’s our right as dead heads to complain about everything related to greed and excess, regardless of our own trust fund balance.
I certainly didn’t mean that. I just didn’t think it was completely unreasonable to pay what VIP Packages were going for based on the significance of the event. Ticket prices were extremely reasonable compared to what I’ve spent taking my kids to Disney On Ice, Yo Gabba Gabba and all the rest of that stuff. The secondary market is out of hand but if folks stayed away from it, prices would drop.
I have a lot of compassion for people truly in need and spend a considerably portion of my time, talent and treasure serving them as I’m able. If I could I’d solve everyone’s problems, I would… I wish I had a trust fund… I’ve heard about them… I have zero inheritance coming my way… I hope you get your tickets my friend…
NAILED IT! Great and honest article.
I did get my tix thru TM and I’m soooo grateful beyond words! Two shows! More than I could ask for. After getting the reject letter from mail order, (first reject letter ever in my many many years) I too was disheartened by the ticketing process and the push-backs and the disorganization. BUT- the grateful dead owe me nothing! And I owe them immensely. I am who I am now because of them and the music. I believe that spreading kindness and good karma brought about the success of my trip to Chicago to see them once again and feel that bliss again
My favorite part of your article- refusing to call them The Core Four! Never! Die-hard Yankee fan and NYer and we know who the core four are and what they represent!! Pinstripers Pride baby!
Well done. Have a grate day!
– Jen
i think you summed that up perfect I think a lot of people feel the same way, travel safe maybe see you at the show or ball, I’ll be with my daughter, funny my email is gratefuldean44
this is the quote that gets me… ” In my opinion, spending less than $3,000 on a package to be part of an entire weekend celebrating something that has given me more joy in life than anything other than my kids and sharing in this historic moment in musical history is a very small price to pay.”
I spent my $3000 already from 1977-1980
That’s funny!!! Another Pepperidge Farms commercial. Tickets for the Songwriters Hall of Fame Induction start at $1250 for the cheap seats. One night, no hotel, no food, no memorabilia…
I stopped touring in the early 90’s; it was time to grow up. I seriously thought about trying for one of the CID packages but it would have blown the vacation budget for the year. Then I remembered that I hate large cities on the 4th of July. I am hoping they stream it via PPV so I can have a party and dance with friends and family. If it isn’t PPV, I hope it is simulcast to a venue somewhere in Florida so I can dance with even more friends and family.
The Grateful Dead and Deadheads really did form the person that I am today. I am kinder, more generous, open minded, and more loving. I can never repay the debt I owe the band and their fans.
Thanks for that. I understand the logic of it as I spent the equivalent of a three day mail order ticket on my three kids birthday at Great Wolf Lodge last week. My priorities are different these days and if I could justify spending 215.00 on a ticket I would. I loved Jerry and had the best times of my adult life before my kids from 81 to 95, but make no mistake, we all gave them as much as we got. As it is, a two or three night Phish run in Portsmouth or Merriweather is looking better and better for me all the time. And I wasn’t referring to you, but all the trust fund kids that always flew to shows and bought tickets from scalpers and complained incessantly about scalpers. Its all good and it will all work out for everybody, or it won’t.
I got my confirmation email the day before the ticketmaster sale and uncontrollably jumped up and down. I tic for each night and the same for my brother. I reached out to as many of my deadhead friends as I could. Vermont, Florida,LA,San Fran,AZ, NY. Of all the people, nobody got a thing. Shocking. Many times felt that I deserved it when I am at a show and many times I feel it to be a previlige. This time is different. I’ve been struck with a wave of humbleness in a way I never felt before. That in itself is fucking magic.
As usual, we are generally thinking along the same lines, unfortunately, I was unable to score anything online, still in limbo with no Snail Mail reject, but no email confirmation either…I have feeling that I’ll be getting some cash in the mail this week, just have 2 figure out where to spend it! Are u still taking videos for your Dance competition???
Yup, send a 1 minute clip to [email protected]
Hear, hear!